I've decided tonight, under the influence of wine, old age and pizza, that now is the time to reassess my relationships with others and embrace the good and drop the baggage.

Everyone has these people in their lives.  The ones who you feel obilgated to for whatever reason.  The ones who you dread seeing.  The one's who's call you strategically avoid.  The ones you pretend to and, at times, really try to like because it's the "right" thing to do, but inside you are secretly counting the seconds until you can get away from them.

There have been many people like that in my life and, loyal and principled Taurus that I am, I try to maintain relationships with these people.  I listen to them bitch and moan about all the injustices in their lives.  I walk them through the continual bad decisions that they make.  I lend an ear for them to vent when they need to, regardless of what is happening in my life.

Basically, I am over it.

I am now at the point in my life where I am done trying, and if you don't like me for it, I'm super sorry for you because you're gonna be missing out on a whole lotta awesome.

Sure, at times I am a bit lonely and isolated in my world of awesome, but never so much that it is worth dappling in the drama-filled world of needy people.

Over the past few years I have put a lot of thought into putting myself out there and connecting with others.  I've pushed myself out of my cozy den of introversion into the world of bars, booze and girl talk only to find that I feel just as empty and lacking for female connection than I was before.  And let me tell you, I would MUCH rather be chillin in my PJ's watching a little Hulu than making small talk with people whom I couldn't possibly care less about if I tried.

So, tonight,  I hereby declare that I am done.  I am done with trying.  I am done with pretending.  I am done with making the effort to convice myself that lame people are really anything but—no matter who they are in my life.

From here on out I am going to concentrate on the few who I really like—the few who seem to "get" me—the few who I can talk to without putting in any effort at all.

I am going to accept that my destiny (and nature) is to be a bit of loner and finally embrace it for the lovely existence that it really is.  I am no longer going to try to fill some ideal that poorly written sitcoms have put in my head.

Because who really wants friends popping over anytime they want...(get it?? "Friends"...oh, nevermind). The mere thought makes me shudder.  What if I am indulging in one of my kinky fantasies/rituals/hobbies that I don't actually have but am paranoid about anyway when you just happen by. How awkward for you?

Basically I am just too old, too tired , too busy and too dang cranky to deal with anyone who doesn't interest me anymore.

All you needy, drama filled people out there can kindly leave me alone and, instead, seek out each other because I am no longer interested in anything besides what makes me happy.

I am going to enter my next decade secure with who I am and what I want and, to me, there really isn't anything better—even if I do it alone.